Giving Up
I do wrong. Sometimes I am wrong. I admit it. The worst part of being wrong, is that sometimes I know that I'm doing wrong, but still want to do it. Why? Sometimes it feels better, seems better, or is more fun. Sometimes, even worse, I flaunt to my friends my wrongdoing, and the good ones call me out. But in this ever growing process of making myself a better person, more complete person, it has become harder and harder to get better. At first the hurdles were small and easy to jump, and as I continue to grow and evaluate I find that its hard to get rid of things I'm used to, things I always do, things that make me happy. I'm at the point where I'm questioning don't I deserve to be happy? Isn't it ok if I only do it now and then? It won't hurt someone, if they never find out right?
So yes, I'm in the tough crossroads. The space were I try to replace happy, good things with those things I need to let go. AND it's winter. My least likeable season! I hate wearing coats and being cold! And I miss my bf! And I'm still sick! BLURGH!
Quietly singing, "The sun will come out TO-MORROW. Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow, there'll be sun!"
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